Dear Cindy – Boyfriend's Interview Attire

My boyfriend doesn't dress very professionally for interviews, and I think it's hurting his chances of landing a job. But whenever I've pressed him about it, he just says he "wouldn't want to work someplace that's uptight about their dress code anyhow." How do I get him to pay more attention to his appearance?

Sincerely,

Girlfriend

You're probably right about him hurting his chances at landing jobs. Interviews are about first impressions and, as I mentioned in an article, are the time to prove that you are civilized, which means, in part, showing that you can be professional. (Not to mention they're the time to show how you're better than the other candidates – something a half-hearted effort won't accomplish.)

While it's entirely reasonable that he wouldn't want to work at a stuffy workplace, there's a point where one has to draw a line between using that preference as an excuse for perpetually not being hired, and sucking it up and putting on typical business attire for a few hours to land a job. After all, he should remember that a person tends to dress up for an interview – i.e., dress more formally than will be expected on a day-to-day basis – in order to form that strong first impression. So even if his chosen career is in something not typically "suited," that doesn't mean that for the interview he shouldn't wear a suit, or at least a pair of pressed khakis and shirt, dress shoes, and a tie. Once you're in, you go with the flow of the workplace.

But this doesn't solve your problem. If he won't listen to you, you may want to speak discreetly to a friend or family member that he trusts and get him/her to deliver the advice. If not, it may be time to consider how long you want to hang on to an unemployed boyfriend who won't help himself.

For more about interviews, see Dress for Success! and the other articles in the Interview Skills section of our index, as well as our other "Dear Cindy" queries about interviewing.