Dear Mark – In Mourning for a Lost Job

I feel like I'm in mourning for my lost job. What can I do?

Sincerely,

In Mourning

Along with events such as marriages, births, divorces, graduations, deaths, the loss of a job is considered, psychologically, a significant life event. Most of us have been there. We've all recognized how unfair the workplace can be, and felt that sense of disappointment when, despite our hard work, we were let go by an employer. And sometimes the cut was so deep, that out of fear and embarrassment of running into former colleagues, we started avoiding certain places.

But you'll have to get over it!

The most important thing is that you take action and start filling up that void in your life with something other than mourning. First, start working on getting a new job. It could be that it's time for a career change, or change in career focus, and if so, check out our Self-Assessment section. And visit our sections on finding a job, résumé writing, and interview skills.

Loss of a job often results in temporarily feeling blue, so make sure that you keep control of your physical health by getting regular exercise and not overeating.

And because it probably also means a loss of a social circle and – at least temporarily – a way to occupy your time, don't neglect the non-work aspects of your life. Think about what really interested and motivated you at work, and find a replacement. Tackle some of those things that you've always wanted to do but didn't have time: take up a hobby or start reading the books on the list that English professors recommend we make – "The 100 Books I Must Read Before I Die." And you could also direct your attentions outward, as you do every day in healthcare, and spend time helping others through volunteering.

But, on the other hand, if you must persist, there are lots of ways to go about mourning your job that you may not have already considered. For example, you could set up a permanent memorial somewhere (I suggest at home, as getting a plot at a cemetery might be a bit expensive for someone who's no longer working). Or you could start wearing black clothes all the time. Indeed, in the past, some people wore lockets to remind them of lost loved ones – maybe you still have that nametag from your first orientation. Or why not mix (former) business with pleasure, and have a real Irish wake!

Seriously though, stop mourning, and recognize your current situation for what it is – a chance to move forward.