I Won't Be Home For Christmas

If you have to work over a holiday, a hospital is a good a place to be. It is warm and friendly, the food is good, and there are plenty of other people in the same predicament as you. My best hospital Christmas was my first. I was a house-doctor (intern) in Liverpool. The emergency departments in those days were always a popular hangout for homeless people. This term had not yet been invented at that time. These men, and they were all men, were then known as "tramps." They tried all year to find a reason to get admitted to hospital and we tried just as hard to resist their efforts.

At Christmas, however, we relented and allowed ourselves to be "conned" into admitting them. Admitting them on the clear understanding that this was a short, five-day stay. As no surgery was scheduled at this time, we had plenty of empty beds, and the hospital was relatively quiet. These old guys – stripped of their dirty clothes and given baths and haircuts – looked not too much different from our other patients and were often better company. They were universally well mannered and deeply grateful for the care, both physical and emotional, that we were giving them. Before sending them back to their unfortunate lives, we gave them a thorough health check and filled them full of good food and iron and vitamins. It was, we were aware, no answer to a terrible social problem. But, we did what we could. We showed a little compassion, gave them some healthcare and in return they made us feel good about working over the holiday. Not a bad deal.

I am now practicing obstetrics, an area of medicine that has no respect for the time or the date. When I finally get to talk to my maker I am going to ask for a small design change. Now that so much miniaturization has taken place, would it be possible to equip the unborn child with a watch and a calendar with all the holidays clearly marked. I think this could really improve the lives of obstetricians, midwives, nurses, and their families. Meanwhile, you play the hand you are dealt.

Over the years I have delivered many Christmas-day babies and one year delivered the first two Christmas babies born in Ottawa. They were twins born a few minutes after midnight on Christmas morning. The parents, who were from the Middle East, were devout Muslims and were happy that we found particular happiness in their very joyous event. After all, we all agreed, Christmas is essentially about a child born to Middle Eastern parents who were away from home.

Another holiday baby that I remember was a New Year baby, the first of the year in our city. We asked the mother whether she would allow us to inform the media, so that they could have the baby featured in the newspapers and on television. The mother declined as she was an illegal immigrant and did not wish the publicity. That year in Canada there had been a great deal of publicity about the number of illegal immigrants in the country, and I thought it quite ironic that the first arrival of the New Year should be a member of this group.

Over the years I have had a fair amount of pressure from parents who wished to have their baby born in the old year rather than in the new one. This is because in many places, it is the child's age on January the first that determines which year he/she will start school. The last thing that these parents wanted was to have the first baby of the New Year and they would suggest all sorts of reasons why I should induce labor in the last week of December.

This year in China the pressure will be in the opposite direction. This last year (2003) was the year of the Goat, not a good one to be born in. Next year (2004) is the year of the Monkey when all babies will be very intelligent. No Chinese mother will be begging for delivery in the old year, but as soon as the New Year arrives, look out!

That brings up another problem for those of us here in China this Christmas. Many of us Westerners will have eaten too much, drunk too much, and had too many late nights over the holiday. Its not so much a New year's resolution as a survival exercise that we get back into some sort of shape. We know what we have to do. Stop all the overeating and get back on a low-fat diet. Cut down on the alcohol and get some exercise. I know its not much fun, but Chinese New Year arrives in about four weeks after the Western New Year and we have to be ready for another bout of excess. It is expected of us. We are Ambassadors. God forbid that we should be so culturally insensitive as not to join with our Chinese friends and indulge ourselves yet again, as we welcome in the Year of the Monkey.

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